


i’m still here

by ellegreenaways



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Female Pronouns for Pidge | Katie Holt, Fluff and Angst, Gen, Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Season/Series 04, Self-Sacrifice, all the dialogue is between keith and pidge, but I never got around to it, i still don’t know how to tag, missing s4e06 voltron scene, obviously, only a little bit, shiro matt and lotor are only mentioned, since s4, this is something ive wanted to write for a while
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2020-04-10
Packaged: 2021-03-01 21:34:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,166
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23573968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellegreenaways/pseuds/ellegreenaways
Summary: a missing scene from voltron 406 that’s long been overdue.
Relationships: Keith & Pidge | Katie Holt
Comments: 3
Kudos: 47





	i’m still here

**Author's Note:**

> a little bit shorter than what im used to writing, but whatever it’s 3am okay.

Pidge was furious. That stupid, fucking _dumbass_.

“Good job, Keith.” She’d said. A job well done. By some miracle he’d been able to take down the Haggar’s shield and stop Naxcela from blowing them to pieces. He’s saved the entire voltron coalition. Saved everything they’d been working for since this began. _Good job, Keith_. 

She hated herself for saying that. How could she have been so stupid. 

_Maybe not with our weapons_.

How did she not see it?

That should have been the first dead giveaway. But she hadn’t been paying attention. Her focus had been on lifting off Naxcela. Not on the rebels. Not on Matt. Not on  Keith . 

She should have figured it out when her brother screamed in her ear, yelling something at Keith. She should have known. She should have figured it out. But she didn’t. 

And when Shiro congratulated him, she didn’t think twice to do the same. Why would she? Their friend, had just saved their lives. And then by the time the adrenaline faded, the words she’d heard in her comm set merely minutes ago, had faded into nothing but a vague memory. 

Then, Matt had pulled her aside when she’d exited the green lion. That wasn’t unusual, but something in his face told her she wasn’t going to like what she heard next. And she’d been right. As he talked, all she could feel was the anger and hurt boiling up inside her. That dumbass.

When she found him, the former red paladin was sitting on the couch in their break room. He was leaned forward on his knees, as if deep in thought. Shiro sat next to him, but the two weren’t talking, which was odd. Pidge knew how close they were. She figured they would have been using this time to catch up, but they weren’t even making eye contact. In fact, they looked more uncomfortable, if anything. 

She shook her head, clearing her thoughts. That wasn’t the point. She took a breath, and headed in their direction.

“Hey, Pid-“

“Get up,” she said, crossing her arms.

Keith looked taken aback by her tone. “What?” 

”I said get up,” she repeated. “Let’s go.”

“Pidge where are you taking me?” 

She was silent, going through a million possible ways she could start this off. None of them were ideal, but then again, this situation wasn’t exactly ideal. When they’d approached an empty hallway of the castle, she stopped abruptly.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” She demanded, facing the older boy. 

He raised an eyebrow, obviously not surprised by the outburst. “Arguably a lot of things, Pidge. You’re gonna have to be more specific.”

She laughed. A curt, humorless laugh. “Is this just a damn _game_ to you?”

“I dont know what you're talking about.”

“Don't play dumb with me, Keith. You know exactly what I mean.”

“Pidge, I’m serious. What the hell are you talking about?”

“How could you possibly be so _fucking_ stupid. Using yourself to take down the shield? You could have died, Keith. _Died_. If it weren’t for Lotor’s stupid ship, you wouldn’t be standing here right now and we wouldn’t be having this conversation.”

He was silent for a minute, as if taking in everything she said. “Oh. That.”

“Oh? _Oh_. That’s all you have to say? _Oh_? Did you not hear me, you idiot. You could have–no–you _would_ have died out there today.”

“Look, Pidge, I’m not going to apologize for what I did, if that’s what you’re looking for.”

She scoffed. “You think a cute little apology is going to cut it? Keith, what the hell were you thinking?”

“I think you know,” he said, looking down.

“Please, enlighten me.”

He sighed. “I did that because of you. All of you. Voltron. Without Voltron, the entire universe was fucked. If I hadn’t done what I did, and Lotor didn’t show up, all of you would be dead too. This isn’t about me, Pidge. This is war, and the war needs  you .“ He paused. “I don’t regret what I did, okay? Is that what you want to hear? Because I’d do it again in a heartbeat if it meant saving the universe.”

Pidge clenched her jaw, choosing her next words carefully. True, she was angry at him, but she was mostly just scared for him. “Do you have any idea how you dying would have affected us?” She asked, letting her guard down slightly. “How it would have affected me?”

He shook his head. Of course he didn’t. As good as he was a fighting and flying, he was shit at reading other people’s emotions.

“Keith, you’re like family to us. You can’t just be throwing yourself out into dangerous situations like that.”

“My life in the grand scheme of things is just a dot in the sky, Pidge. You guys are capable of changing so much more than I can here. If I die, someone else will just take my place, but if Voltron dies, there’s no one left to pick up the pieces.”

“You’re not expendable. You matter to a lot of people here; your  _life_ matters.” 

“I’m not saying it doesn’t-“

“Then stop trying to throw it away!”

“I’m not!”

“Then what are you trying to say? Help me understand, please,” she begged. She could feel herself trembling. Out of anger. Out of hurt. Maybe both.

“If it’s my life versus the lives of millions, there’s never going to be a time I don’t pick them. It’s not like I want to die,” he said, looking at her. “But I will, if it means that innocent people get to live. If it means that Zarkon gets defeated, and to do that, we need you, all of you. And getting through that shield was the only way you’d survive.”

“We would have figured something out...”

He shook his head. “Pidge, you and I both know that there wasn’t enough time. I did what had to be done. And yeah, I got lucky that Lotor stepped in. I’m glad I didn’t have to go through with it, but you know that it won’t stop me from doing it again if I have to, right? You guys are too important to lose this far into the war.”

“You’re important too, you know” she said meekly. “You’re still important even if you’re not apart of voltron.”

“I know.”

”Your work with the blades is just as important as our work with voltron.”

”I know.”

“You were going to sacrifice yourself for us without saying goodbye.”

“I know, and I’m sorry.”

She looked at him, the tears she’d been holding back for the longest time, flooding her eyes. “I could have lost you, Keith. I just found Matt, I’m not ready to lose another brother.”

She felt his arms wrap her into a hug. This was new. A gesture unusual for Keith. Something unfamiliar, but comforting. 

“I’m still here,” he whispered, holding her tighter.

She smiled. “Good. Don’t let go.”

**Author's Note:**

> i usually write a bunch of angsty keith almost dies fanfics, but i felt this one was long overdue. im still mad this was never addressed in the show, because it’s really important and for some reason they thought it was a good idea to never talk about it again.
> 
> i think the friendship between pidge and keith is immensely underrated. she refers to him as a brother but i guess if you’re into a romance for them you can read it that way. i either ship keith with everyone, or no one, so i really don’t care. 
> 
> i wrote this kind of like, pidge being mad, but really she was just worried about him and scared, but she masked it with anger. idk. that’s why it gets so soft at the end, because she just wanted keith to be okay and know that he’s loved. me too pidge. me fucking too.


End file.
